It feels like everything was slipping away, like sand through fingers, no matter how tightly they tried to hold on. Every step taken with hope only led to another dead end. Every effort seemed to fade into nothing. It was not always like this. There were days when dreams felt close, when goals seemed possible, when life had meaning. But now, everything felt heavy, like carrying a weight that had no shape but pressed down harder with each passing moment.
There were times when people said hard work always paid off, that patience was the key, that things would eventually get better. Those words used to bring comfort. Now, they felt empty. Every opportunity lost was a reminder of what could have been, of what was once within reach but never held for long. It was not just one chance that disappeared, but many. They came like waves, offering a moment of hope before pulling everything away. The struggle was real, the pain constant.
The world moved forward, but it felt like standing still. Watching others succeed, hearing their laughter, seeing their achievements—it felt like being left behind. They were moving towards something, while it felt like standing in darkness, unable to find a way out. It was not jealousy, not even bitterness, but a hollow feeling deep inside. A silent question: why them and not me? Was it something missing, something not enough? Or was it just fate, deciding who gets to move forward and who stays behind?
Memories of past chances played over and over. That one job interview that almost worked out. That relationship that could have been something beautiful. That dream that almost became real before slipping away. So many almosts, so many nearlies. But almosts do not change lives, and nearlies do not build futures. They only haunt the mind, reminding of what was lost.
It was hard to explain to people who had never felt it. They said, “Try again,” as if trying was not already a daily fight. They said, “Be positive,” as if a shift in mindset could erase years of disappointments. They did not understand that the mind was exhausted, the heart was drained, the soul felt empty. There was nothing left to give, and still, the world expected more. It was like standing in a storm with no shelter, bracing for the next hit but not knowing when it would come.
Sleep did not bring peace. Even in dreams, the mind replayed failures, rewriting them with better endings, only to wake up to the same reality. The weight of expectations, of society’s judgment, of self-doubt—it was unbearable. Every attempt to move forward felt like pushing against a wall that would not break. The motivation that once existed was now lost, buried under layers of exhaustion.
It was not just about career or success. It was about meaning. About purpose. Without opportunities, without hope, what was the point? It felt like being trapped in a never-ending loop, waking up to the same emptiness, going through the same motions, feeling the same pain. Life used to be exciting, full of possibilities. Now, it was just existing, surviving, waiting for something to change but not knowing if it ever would.
Loneliness crept in slowly. Friends moved on with their lives, family members grew tired of giving advice, and eventually, even self-conversations felt repetitive. The thoughts inside became louder, doubts turned into beliefs, and soon, it felt like there was no way out. The darkness was not just around—it was inside. And no one could see it, no one could understand.
Looking at the world, it seemed like everyone had a path, a direction, a place to go. But for some, the road disappeared, and no matter how much they searched, no new one appeared. It was not laziness, not a lack of trying, not even fear. It was exhaustion. Pure, deep exhaustion from fighting battles that never ended.
People said, “Just take the next step.” But where? When every step before led to nowhere, when every door knocked on remained shut, when every prayer was met with silence—what then? What happens when hope is no longer enough? When faith wavers? When strength is gone? No one had an answer.
Tears did not come easily anymore. There was a time when crying helped, when emotions flowed freely. But now, there was just numbness. The heart stopped expecting good news, the mind stopped dreaming, the soul stopped believing. It was easier that way. To expect nothing meant no more disappointments.
But deep down, even in the darkest moments, a small voice whispered. Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow. But someday, something might change. The past could not be erased, the lost opportunities could not be brought back, but maybe, just maybe, something new could begin. That hope was faint, weak, almost nonexistent. But it was there. And maybe, just maybe, it was enough to hold on for one more day.
